Ms. Towne Quotes (Trimester 2) Part 1

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Ms. Towne Quotes (Trimester 2) Part 1

Corrine Olson, Blueprint Staff

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After the support I received from many of my fellow APUSH students, I’ve decided to make a sequel to my ‘Ms. Towne Quotes (Trimester 1)’ article. So, here we go- Trimester 2!

*DISCLAIMER* these are all sarcastic comments meant to amuse us students in class.

“Period 6 is period 4 on steroids… a crazy steroid hulk period.”

“Have more babies.”

“…because you’re just that generous.”

“It’s a baby sneeze.”

“They’re children- they have no reason or purpose.”

“The FBI starts to be going like ‘What?'”

“National Bank… a pony… Party Hat Wednesday.”

“Taylor Swift Fridays? I know Taylor Swift inspires many conversations.”

“We’re still little baby Hercules!”

“I try not to think.”

(about the imminent apocalypse) “I’ve got 9 cows and land. Y’all better be useful, people!”

“No joy in studying.”

“Go Martha Stewart!”

“Take its little babies and shove them into the ground.”

“Mother Nature might have different ideas about Alaska.”

“So we shop at Walmart!”

(to class) “Pretend you had friends.”

“You’d get FLIPPIN’ ANNOYED with that person.”

“Slapping China.”

“Australia has a car industry.”

“Women screaming ‘Kiss my baby!’, and babies being thrown at him.”

“If you want to avoid your family over the holidays: Non-Trad!”

*in toddler voice* “I’m gonna tariff you bigger-est!”

“My sneeze is the most feminine thing about me.”

“Good job for being you.”

“I need a desk right here so I can make a big noise.”

(about Marie Antoinette) “Instead of a stone-cold whatchamacallit, she’s more of a ditz.”

*demon voice* “I need to squash the Pennsylvanian farmers.” -Hamilton

“Yeah, I hate you. (What’s your name?)”

“3 to 6 ships. We just doubled our Navy.”

“Where are all the sluts?”

“Think dog, see dog, be dog.”

“Any World War II fans in here?”

“What is George Washington’s problem with the Pirates of The Caribbean?”

“This bear is gonna be one of my minions in the zombie apocalypse… this bear would’ve done the non-trad.”

“‘Did you hear what the French names were? I couldn’t understand them.’ ‘We’ll just call them X, Y, and Z.'”

“Those French are bad people because they drink a lot of coffee and smoke a lot of cigarettes!”

“I’m going to add bees to my farm.”

“I’m making the nom-nom sound. Nom nom nom nom nom.”

“Who’s your daddy?” *points to herself*

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