The Chinese government made headlines recently for their proposed “Social Credit System,” which would assign each Chinese citizen a point score based on certain actions.  For instance, purchasing a textbook or Chinese-made products would lead a citizen’s score to go up, while purchasing a video game or breaking the law would lead it to go down.  People with low credit scores would have certain privileges taken away.

Here at the BHS Blueprint, we wondered what a Social Credit System at Blaine High School could – or should – look like.  Here are some of our ideas.

Speeding in the parking lot: -1 point per mile per hour

Being a Freshman: -20 points per day

Shoulder checking in the hallways: +5 points if the person checked is annoying, -5 otherwise

Finishing a book you’re assigned: +2 points

Using profanity: +5 points if directed at Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance or Mr. Banse, -5 otherwise

Leaving your tray on the lunch tables: -100 points

Joining the Blueprint: +1 point per article you write

Surviving APUSH: +10 points

Canoodling: -100 points

Putting trash in the trash can: +400 points if trash in question is Mr. Loo’s cactus; +5 points otherwise

Leaving a lunch table cleaner than you found it: +18 points

Calling a teacher by their first name: -1 point

Having a positive meeting with an admin: +92 points

Believing that being a freshman should have nothing to do with social status: -40 points per day

Objectifying women: instantly become President of the United States

Playing Roblox in the IMC before school: +20 points for coolness

Having an inflated ego: +5 points if person has a 4.0 GPA, -100 points otherwise

Under this system, students with high social scores would be eligible to sit at the circle tables at lunch and receive “Get Out of Homework Free” cards; students with low social scores would have their parking privileges revoked and be forced to take classes with boring teachers.