Why Is It So Hard to Ask Out Your Crush?

Photo from Pixabay

Photo from Pixabay

Corrine Olson, Blueprint Staff

 

It’s homecoming week, and the dance is coming up, which can only mean one thing. Dozens of girls will go pick out dresses and go together as a pack of single gals, and dozens of guys will be at home on their Xboxes (at least, that’s what my brother will be doing). Only those few lucky souls out of the hundreds of students in BHS will be there with a partner.

But this article isn’t for the minority, this is for the lonely, lovesick children who, like me, need a bit of a shove in the right direction before being able to obtain a relationship with a person they like. So, I decided that I could collect some information that could help me out a bit in the future, and share it with all of you.

First off: I know from those around me, as well as some personal experiences, that you should never ask someone out over text. Always be looking directly at the person (there are exceptions to this, such as people who live far, far apart from each other). Recently, a girl I know had someone ask her out via texting. She rejected them almost immediately, and tries to avoid them at all costs. The worst thing isn’t even that she turned him down. It’s that she has the messages, and is able to show them to whomever she wants to.

Now that the obvious has been covered, we can get to the good stuff. I asked some high schoolers. “Why is it really hard to tell someone that you like them in person?” and their collective answers were quite clear.

“Fear of rejection.”

“Because you’re afraid that they won’t have the same feelings. And then you over analyze it in the end.”

“Fear of rejection, possibly. All you need to do is take the time to build up courage.”

Their advice to me was actually quite comforting as well, as you can see that they said that you just can wait until you build up courage, or that you’re probably overanalyzing it anyways, which are both usually true. How many times have you thought about being rejected by someone you like? Probably more than you’re willing to admit, but if you ask someone out, what’s the worst that could happen? They could say ‘no’? Breathe. Relax. Once you get over that fear of rejection you realize that there really isn’t anything to be nervous about. If they reveal that the feeling is mutual, you get to go out with the person, something that might not have happened if neither of you had asked the other out. Even if the answer is ‘no’, the world won’t end just because so-and-so doesn’t like you. You now realize that they don’t have feelings for you, and can now move on. I mean, what can you do about it?

But lucky you, this is the 21st century, and there are actually some ways to get your crush to like you more. Though they’re not 100% guaranteed, it’s still better than walking up to a random girl you think is cute and asking her out at her locker (happened to me once- don’t even remember the guy’s name).

The very easy way to get someone’s attention, is simply to get their attention. It’s been scientifically proven that people are more likely to crush on others who they are around a lot, for the evolutionary sake of it just being easier. Don’t shy away from them whenever the person you like passes by. Talk to them. Joke around. Hang out. Offer help with schoolwork, if you’re in class with them, or ask them for help with yours.

So good luck, I wish you the best of luck and hope you put these tips to good use!