Batman vs. Superman is gonna suck…really bad

I’ve given up all hope for DC…

Courtesy+of+Warner+Bros.

Courtesy of Warner Bros.

Max Koop, BHS Blueprint Staff Member

 

It was a great day until I saw the new trailer for Batman vs. Superman. This is not a trailer review. It would be but then Jesse Eisenberg showed up. I love Jesse Eisenberg actually. I mean The Social Network is one of my favorite movies he is awesometacular in that movie. I thought he was gonna play Lex kinda like in The Social Network, manipulative and almost unpredictable. As soon as he showed up I turned off the trailer immediately and formed into the fetal position and cried. I think Jesse Eisenberg knew this movie was gonna be bad, so he just decided to have some fun.

Marvel knows what it’s doing. It knows that can be serious but not take itself too seriously. DC comics is taking the nothing but dark tone for its movies. They’re taking everything so seriously. With some characters like say Batman, that makes sense, but doing everything that way, stupid move. I actually do like Man of Steel but that was a sign that DC was making a brutal u-turn into hell. It would help if they got Zack Snyder the #^$! out of there.

You’re asking me, “Well if he can’t do it who can then? Huh? Huh?”

I’ll tell you who, Matthew Vaughn, that’s who. He’s proved to us with 3 movies that he can make a kick-ass comic book movie(Pun intended). He’s done X-Men:First Class, Kingsmen, and my personal favorite Kick-Ass. His comic book movies are a good example of movies that can take itself seriously with great atmosphere, good characters, great action, and some fun. Christopher Nolan could also do it but he’s done with the DC franchise.

Also, what is it these days and comic book movies overstuffing their movie. Like Avengers 2 and, The Amazing Spider-Man 2. This movie seems stuffed to the point where it’s about to explode. Not as much as The Amazing Spider-Man 2, because that was a godawful mess. I think just Batman and Superman would be fine, but for some reason they wanted to shove Aquaman, Wonder Woman, and even Cyborg into the mix. Might as well throw in Green Lantern and Flash and you got yourself the Justice League. But seriously no one asked for Aquaman you’re just pulling names out of hats now.

Why did you cast Ben Affleck as well. I mean I’m a fan of his work, his best, in my opinion, being Gone Girl. He seems like the most cliche guy in the world to play Batman. I won’t be surprised if Matt Damon is chosen as Robin.

~A Conversation between Ben Affleck and Matt Damon~

Matt Damon: DC keeps denying me a role in their universe. What do I do Ben?

Ben Affleck: If I get in they’ll have to let you in cause we’re like brothers. If I say let you in, they will let you in.

Matt Damon: Wow, thanks Ben, you’re the best bro!

That’s the only logical reason I could think of why they cast Ben Affleck as Batman.

OK..OK I’m done ranting about how much Batman vs. Superman is gonna suck. Who knows I could be totally wrong. It could be better than The Dark Knight. Oh god..Just forget I ever said that OK please? If Star Wars isn’t good I’m switching to indies.