The Pre-Senior Depression and the Post-Senior Acceptance

Each junior has to accept that next year, right after their last summer of pre-graduate education, they will move up the ladder to be seniors. Both embraced and despised, the senior title is one of authority and clout and a bitter feeling of confusion and disillusionment. Those who dare to peer beyond the curtain of senior freedom is a wasteland of adult suffering and economic instability, mixed with an overwhelming pressure from college and the workforce. The question of all questions arises, “Who am I?”

In just one year, juniors are expected to be fully aware of their future, both occupationally and academically. The choice of a college is pressed on high-school students the second they open the doors to their school, and the thought of exploring creativity is overshadowed by the financial promise of doing the same thing as everyone else. Choosing the right college and major is fundamental to your future now, and diverging from the path is now threatened by increasing rates of young-adult poverty and debt. 20 years ago, one could study math for 4 years then switch to English and still make it in the world, but now having an undecided mind is like having a ticking time-bomb for a brain. If you follow the wrong path, the ticks of that bomb sound around every corner, and eventually you’ll end up in chunks plastered on your dorm room’s walls because you realized your mistake.

So when your family or teachers ask, what are you wanting to do, they’re really saying, “what do you think is possible to achieve without exploding”, or “have you made all the right moves to have any options?” This is an enormous pressure and couple that with the societal pressures of fitting in as a senior, which includes prom and an alumni legacy, that last summer is really a period of depression for every junior.

If you made it past the summer without one sliver of depression, then you chose not to look past the curtain, and that will set you back in the long-run. In film, there is a beat, or story phase, called: The Dark Night of the Soul. It is argued that without this moment, a character could never progress past the second act and resolve their overall conflict, and the summer before senior year is essentially that. Rename it The Dark Night of the Student, and it makes perfect sense. If a soon-to-be senior avoids the reality of life beyond high school, they’ll never achieve post-senior acceptance. If the pre-senior depression is The Dark Night of the Student, than post-senior acceptance is the resolution. This is the moment where Cobb in Inception finally sees his children’s faces or in the sixth Star Wars when the emperor is thrown over into the void. A senior can’t completely be an adult without post-senior acceptance, and if never achieved, they may be forever immature and inadequate to other adults. This isn’t because they can’t change, but it’s because they don’t know how to.

Most juniors never feel this pressure until it’s too late, and by then, it’s really hard to go forward. The rare few that see their future closing in, and plan ahead for its arrival, which includes applying to colleges and seeking out an occupation, are the ones that succeed. This is the system we as a generation and the generation below us are forced to be in. If your aspirations are too creative for the everyday job, and you can’t see a world in which you aren’t writing or painting something, odds are there is no place for you. This is why the pre-senior depression and the post-senior acceptance are so important. For those with an attainable goal in mind, and a clear path, nearly everything is on you and your intelligence. Your dream job of being a surgeon, salesmen, and a teacher are only held back by a half-decade of college and a couple of nearly insurmountable tests. The pre/post situation is usually fairly easy and achievable for these students and is the route that is safest and wisest.

For those who read the words: “follow your heart”, or “anything is possible”, the pre/post situation is a lot harder. You will endure the darkest night and have accept reality with more skepticism. The system was not designed for us, we do not belong. Only 10% of us succeed while 90% of us sell our souls to make the latest Fifty Shades of Grey flick or a company’s logo instead of actually utilizing our skills. For us, this depression is essential, and it is meant for us. Do not search for it, because it will hit you, and be thankful for it. This is the depression that makes you realize the majority of top Hollywood directors earned a degree in something other than film before heading to LA, and that most artists never achieve fame until they have a stable home life. Fight it if you must, but by the time senior year rolls around, learn to trust the new purpose it has instilled upon you. Those who don’t achieve post-senior acceptance rush into things with only heart and no actually knowledge or experience. Everyone wants to be a prodigy, but after a while, most just want to taste success.

This bitter period is tough, but be aware that after every storm is a rainbow and things get better with time. Just remember that taking your time in approaching your future is essential, and to never rush into anything too important. Every choice can be detrimental to your future prospects, but each decision may take you one step closer to your full potential. Let this brief depression move your body, and await the acceptance that follows. Doing a job that others do is still admirable, and somewhere someone is looking up to you.

Thanks for reading, Joel Freecheck.

Editor-In-Chief of the BHS Blueprint, Blaine High School’s student newspaper.