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10 Interesting Facts You Never Needed To Know: Animals

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FOTW

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No. 1: Arrogant Cats

Image result for cats

Whether you’re a cat or dog person, you know that cats can’t follow directions, even if their life depended on it.

What you don’t know is that cats can follow directions they just choose not to. That’s right, those adorable little furballs that look like they can do no wrong are actually pure arrogance given a cute and satisfying physical form.

Studies show that cats can perfectly understand human commands but merely choose to not follow them; probably because they feel it’s beneath them.

No. 2: Lobster Wars

stock photo, lemon, plate, dinner, meal, lunch, seafood, boston, cutlery, lobster, crayfish, napkin, citrus, platter, fries, dishes, butter, food-and-drink, slaw

Do you know the phrase: “wars have been started for much less?” well it turns out that’s indeed true, and in this case for much, much, much less.

Example? Just look at the Lobster war between Brazil and France. The iconically named incident was a conflict between the two countries between 1961 and 1963. 

The conflict? An argument between the two countries on whether Lobsters crawled or swam. 

Luckily the conflict was resolved peacefully which is a good thing cause a war on that question would have been embarrassing for both sides, because they can do both.

No. 3: Unsatisfied Birds

File:Platycercus eximius -Woodland Park Zoo, Woodland Park Zoo, Seattle, Washington, USA-8a (1).jpg

 

 

 

Chances are you’ll meet a bird at some point or other in your life, so this is definitely a need to know.

If you ever meet a bird that’s willing to let you pet them, assuming they don’t destroy your fingers first or scratch off your face, then you need to know how to properly pet these easily frustrated birds, sexually frustrated that is.

That’s right the proper method of petting a bird is to pet their heads, because petting their backs can sexually stimulate them and often leaves them sexually frustrated.

No. 4: Space Worms

Image result for worm

Not that you really need to know this anyways, but in 2015 scientists sent flatworms to the International Space Station for five weeks to see how space affected their growth.

One of the worms grew a second head, when they returned to earth scientists amputated the heads, both of them grew back, showing that space had permanently changed the worm.

Can you even imagine what that worm was thinking, or what the new head was thinking? 

What I do know is that they were both definitely mad at getting their heads cut off, I know I would.

No. 5: Walking Catfish

Image result for walking catfish

Talk about not liking where you live.

This particular species of catfish has the ability to crawl out of waterways and make their way across the ground and roadways to other roadways, though they can only stay out of the water for as long as they stay moist.

Scientists say that it’s a product of evolution but I think this particular catfish was just driven away by the neighbors — over and over and over again. 

Nevermind, their just antisocial. The psychologically closest animal I can think of at the moment, at least when it comes to fish.

No. 6: Drunk Flies

Image result for flies

Being an alcoholic can often lead to sexual frustration, considering the fact that the scent of alcohol often drives everyone away, and the fact that they can rarely stay conscious enough to do the deed.

However, fruit flies take the opposite approach instead of alcoholism being the cause of their sexual frustration, sexual frustration is the cost of their alcoholism.

That’s right, fruit flies often resort to drinking alcohol when sexually frustrated.

I blame the parents.

No. 7: Caring Cat

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Cat’s can apparently be merciful creatures.

After a man had a series of strokes, he attempted to teach his cat how to dial a 911 speed dial.

The owner later fell from his wheelchair during a seizure; police received a silent 911 call from the house and arrived at the house to find the incapacitated owner and the cat by the phone.

A loving caring cat you say. I say it’s a cold, calculating beast who didn’t want its servant to expire before its use was up.

 

No. 8: Balanced Eagles

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I’ve never met someone who doesn’t adore eagles, I mean what’s not to adore? they’re cool and collected animals that look like they have everything together — well balanced some would say.

Apparently not only are eagles balanced personality wise, but also physically.

When a bald eagle loses a feather on one side (natural or otherwise) it will shed the same feather on the other side, keeping it balances both inside and out.

 

No. 9: One-Shot Bee

Image result for Bee

Bees may be as vital to the survival of the ecosystem just us as the sun is, but that doesn’t make them any less pathetic, there in many ways one-shots.

Not only can they only sting once before they die like the pathetic creatures they are, but they can also only engage in sexual conduct once in their lives, most likely because they die promptly after following the explosion of their testicles.

Let’s not forget they only live once. pathetic, I’ve got an afterlife I’m looking forward to. I wonder if Lucifer is as pleasant as I imagined.  We’ll see.

No. 10: Birds on the Grind

Image result for skinny bird legs

We’ve learned a lot about the nature of birds today, but we should keep in mind that they’re in many ways human, not only are they self-conscious, but they’re also quite hardworking.

It’s not uncommon for birds to mock each other about their skinny bird legs (like the bullies they are), however, interestingly enough after being mocked, birds will often dedicate themselves to an intensive training regimen to tone those legs. Rarely is it effective.

They probably get the gym membership but never show up.

 

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10 Interesting Facts You Never Needed To Know: Animals